I've Got This!

May I Whine?

HA! It's official!


We will be moving from our hometown of Kingman, AZ-to what my children will call their hometown-Lynchburg, VA! Things are set for hubby to attend Liberty Baptist Theological Seminary this fall. Everything is a go!! 


God, you're so faithful and so amazingly, awesomely over-abundant! You've shown us your love and your sheer power to move mountains! We have prayed and prayed for your will, and you have shown us that our hearts are in line with yours! I have grown to expect your best for me. I know you plan to use me in a real and mighty way. Thank you for what you're doing in our lives, Lord Jesus. 


So, anyway-a few of the things I'm looking forward to are:


1. The Community Market
2. Apartment living
3. Meeting new people
4. Beautiful scenery
5. Discovering new interests
6. Changing seasons
7. Flames and Hillcats games
8. Not knowing anyone at all (for a while anyway)
9.
10.


And the list will just go on and on...something I'm really looking forward to is the "not knowing anyone at all" part. There's something amazing about anonymity (I presume) that I can't quite put my finger on at this juncture. I'm surely going to appreciate it though. I just know it:) I am imagining a place where I can actually go to the store without seeing anyone that I MUST politely engage in at least a little friendly chit-chat. The obligatory nod or smile...you know what I'm saying. It's not that I'm unfriendly or want to be a 'loner' or anything. I think I'm just in need of a break...ya know? Some people can afford to get out of town for a few days, or go out of the country for a little RESET on life and dealings therein.


I just need to get away for a refreshing outlook. I need to be in a place where I WANT to make small talk with people. Smile and befriend people. Care about and LOVE people. I'm not making excuses for myself, but this town we're in isn't exactly...well, I'm not gonna go there. God knows what I need and I am humbled to know He loves me so much that He's making it possible for me to have this much needed change in my current status. Ahh, it feels so good! 


And so, I wish I had more time to share some details about the place we'll be moving to, but I don't have any. Time that is. I've gotta get up and start packing..

Sometimes we just need to be reminded of God's promises and how we can claim them for ourselves today. I'm about to dig into His Word for some guidance through this season of life. Would you join me?

Click on the link above to find out where I'm getting my study material:) While you're there, feel free to check out the entire website. There are TONS of great lessons, videos, radio broadcasts, etc. Good food for your soul!

I've recently been doing a lot of writing on a chalkboard surface...and thinking...and that's where the trouble begins. So, I checked out Edie's post over at lifeingrace. Ahhh-mazing! I now am obsessing about when and where I'd LOVE to have a chalk surface...for ME. Well, I guess the kids would enjoy it a little too. And maybe my husband would leave me a sweet little note here and there...Anyway, I thought you'd enjoy this GINorMOUs collection of chalkboard related stuff over at The Nesting Place.

Make sure you get some coffee and keep the kids occupied so you can browse through all of this stuff. Better yet, have the kids curl up with you and look at the ideas together:) Inspirational for the whole family! Good weekend projects or family projects that pay off for years to come.

I don't expect rose petals in my bubble bath, chocolate truffles, or even a nice sappy card. I never wish for jewelry, money, or anything of the sort. Valentine's Day is always "just another day" for my husband and I. Well, aside from the banquet we attend to support our church's youth group going to camp each year:) We pretty much have an understanding that we don't really acknowledge the holiday. And I can honestly say I'm o.k. with that! My husband jokes and says "everyday is Valentine's Day with him." But, it's not far from the truth. My man is a vocal one. Supportive, affectionate, complimentary...just all around a stand-up dream guy! God must really love me to give me Jason as my spouse.

But, this year he just blew me away! He came home from work Tuesday with a package and took the kids aside and gave them a little purple box and told them to tell me "Happy Valentine's Day, Mommy! This is for you because you're the best mommy in the whole world!" So, about to cry, I opened the box and saw the most thoughtful gift I've EVER received. It's a heart-shaped locket necklace with charms inside. Charms that my honey picked out that just so greatly capture my heart! There are 3 kids inside, the 2 girls each with their birthstones, and my boy with his birthstone wearing a baseball cap. Then he chose a "J" initial to represent himself, a "walk with God" charm and an "I love coffee" charm. It is THE cutest and most precious gift. And a total surprise! MAJOR brownie points for Daddy:)) I just can't stop smiling at him and it has been 2 days since he gave it to me.

Can I just mention that this came at the PERFECT time for me? I have been ultra concerned about my man lately and our relationship! Not that we were on really rocky ground or ever have the potential of "not working things out" so to speak. We've just really gone through a difficult season of marriage lately. A few things have contributed to this: 1. He got a "promotion" at work and has had great new stress to go along with that. 2. We've just started to educate our children at home. 3. Finances are in the same wobbly boat even after that "promotion" so it makes it even more difficult to take on the extra stress and not be well-compensated for it. 4. I'm sure there's a 4.....so all these things have been taking a toll on what would typically be a pretty healthy line of communication. He has been quiet. He has been short with the children. He has been distant from me. Just very preoccupied. His phone has been ringing with work calls, emails, texts. His joy has been robbed time and time again. I've tried (most of the time) to just be understanding, keep my distance, keep the children at bay, pray for him...most of the time.

Ya know when you just get to that point where you've had enough and God just doesn't seem to be doing His part? Well, I can tell you from experience, that's when you need MORE THAN EVER to keep your mouth SHUT!!! I wish I could tell you that I learned by doing it the right way:( NOPE. I couldn't keep my mouth shut. Breaking point came, I broke. In front of the children nonetheless! Caused a HUGE stink. And guess what? The thing that made me break, well, I was justified for feeling the way I did! I just needed to keep my mouth shut a few SECONDS longer and God would have stepped in and handled it HIS way. But, I didn't. So, I learned the hard way. I hope I learned anyway. I pray I learned and don't have to repeat this turmoil again! And, ultimately, Jas and I talked things out (although it took longer than ever in 8 years of marriage) over the next few days. He was relieved to get some stuff off his chest, and so was I. We finally connected after a few months of being so distant and crabby! And to know that he had already ordered that necklace before we had our blowout means that much more to me!! He never stopped loving me with all his heart. He was just distracted. It really stinks that things had to get so uncomfortable, and ultimately really ugly to realize that we just needed to make time for US. To be boyfriend and girlfriend for awhile. To laugh with each other. Oh, I just love to see him smile at me!! It makes me feel like such a treasure to my man. I love to feel treasured. Don't you?

I pray for each of you who read this. I pray that you have much more strength in obedience to God than I do. I wish you'd take away from my story to keep your mouth shut. No, really! I know it sounds harsh, but it could really make all the difference! I waited MONTHS in obedience. Held my tongue. Did my best to be a servant of my husband without demanding anything in return. But, sadly I did not hold out long enough. I knew God would answer my prayers to bring my Jason out of his funk, but He didn't do it fast enough to suit me:( See what happens when you get impatient with God and start stompin' your feet like a little bratty kid? Ughh...let's try to finish strong next time, Talisha.

All week, we've watched the same 10 episodes of He-Man over and over. Ugh...so done. But the kids have been insistent. "Daddy, when can we sit in your lap and watch He-Man?" It occurred to me almost instantly, these little children of mine are programmed to cram everything into a few days on the weekend. They fight for their daddy time, fight for meaningful time spent with us. I think it will be several weeks before they realize that we'll no longer adhere to that routine. That we're free to love on each other at 10am for example. That we can spend more time together laughing at the E*Trade baby, more time fighting over who is going to pick up that giant fuzzy bug in the kitchen floor. These are the things that I can understand as an adult to be the best times of our lives. My kids don't get it right now. They miss their class-mates and still talk about school as if they're on an extended break. I knew it would be something we'd have to work through, and I'm just so thankful that because they're so little, they have had a positive experience with school. I'm also extremely thankful that even though they miss their friends, they're excited and happy to be at home with me!

On another topic, I have been a cleaning machine! It feels so good to be a keeper at home. I have been on such a crazy schedule for so long with everything and everybody else demanding all of my time, that this last week has been amazingly productive. Inside the walls of our home, I have changed a bathroom faucet, re-organized our pantry, cleaned our kitchen top to bottom, painted the room we're now going to use as our school room, written out our favorite 21 meals, Bug helped with this task:) and so many more small things that I've just had to set aside for so long! I'm loving the idea of making a kitchen binder to hold our favorite recipes, meal planning stuff...anything to do with the kitchen. OOOH! Another thing I did that I'm extremely proud of, I made a cleaning kit. The beautiful thing about this is that I used some pretty kid-friendly items so that the Bug and my Sweet Boy can help me out. They LOVE to help me wipe and dust and vacuum (but cry while cleaning their rooms?!). I got a TON of terrific ideas about keeping my home from Martha Stewart's Homekeeping Handbook. It's funny that I know what to do and how to clean, but love to read about how other people do things. I find it inspiring for some reason. Okay, that's enough I think to sum up this last week. Except, I have to say, my husband's birthday came and went and he now shares his birthday with the horrible Haiti earthquake:( My heart has been hurting for that place. I feel...well, probably the same as you all feel. Sick. Helpless. I feel like prayer, although necessary and powerful, just somehow isn't enough. And who am I to say that?? God is sovereign over all. He knew this day was coming long before we did. And I have to trust that whatever happens from here on out, things will work out according to His perfect will and plan. And I must also say, I just love Dr. Charles Stanley. I absolutely do NOT know what I would do without his ministry. I loooove www.intouch.org and use it daily for precious time spent with Jesus. I am encouraging you all to go there and explore if you haven't. I think it will be a blessing to you.


I need some feedback: I'm looking for computer software for the kids, learning games, etc...any ideas or specific things you use or have wanted to try??

I sooo just got myself in trouble starting this blog! I have seen many blogs, in fact, it was just about a week ago that I read my first blog on purpose. So, I guess it's safe to say I'm obsessed with blogging right now, and naturally, my next step into the blogging world would be this one. Wanna know how the sickness began? Read on.

My husband and I have been praying for a year about the decision whether or not to homeschool our 2 kids. We actually started out (half-heartedly) homeschooling our little girl, who I'll call Bug, in Kindergarten. It proved itself to be difficult, and at the time I was distracted by anti-depressant induced health issues, and was also faced with the reality of needing to go back to work to help out with finances. So, needless to say, I gave up. Quickly. In the meantime, I reluctantly dragged my baby into public school (the "best" of what this town has to offer-in our neighborhood, mind you). She was scared to death having never been away from her mother (no pre-school experience) and I HATED to leave her at a school all day. For I had never experienced this separation from my baby. It was a drastic change and a horrible feeling I won't soon forget. My sweet son, who was just 3 at the time, was safe with family while I went to work, so leaving him wasn't nearly as gut-wrenching.

So, Bug went to school. I went to work. My dear husband, went to work. My sweet son went to Grami's. Then I quit work, and started up a restaurant with my parents. NO SMALL TASK. Sweet Son started Pre-school at the local Charter school, while Bug attended 1st grade at the same school. Fortunately, during this time, the kids were chosen at random to attend the charter school together. They were now in a safe, loving environment that I felt better about leaving them in all day. So, the restaurant was busy growing, my family was busy growing, and I was just busy busy.
STOP THE INSANITY!!

And this brings us to where I am now...my daughter is in 2nd grade, my son a kindergartner. They are both doing very well at the local charter school. Excellent grades, wonderful teachers, superb principal and staff. And might I add, it takes years to get into this school. There's literally a waiting list that you sign them up for at BIRTH and hope they get in for Kindergarten or 1st grade. It's CRAZY! But it's an excellent school, so I understand why. Yet, I still feel the tug on my heart-strings (namely, the Holy Spirit) to bring my babies home with me. Did I mention I'm not working at the restaurant now? I feel comfortable, like I said, with the school and everthing about it. Except something is missing from my kids' daily lives. Enough Family. Ample Bible teaching. A 24/7 Christian worldview which they cannot have at their age without constant guidance! These are just a few things in number, but they are HUGE in my personhood. These three things are EVERYTHING in my life. The legacy I wish to leave these children is solely the knowledge that Jesus Christ is real and available to them and to everyone. I want my kids to know Jesus. I want my grandkids to know Jesus.

You get the point, so this is it. On January, 14, 2010, we will remove our 2 children from the charter school that we love, so that we may obey our God and pursue our rightful responsibility in training up our children in the way that they should go. It is with extremely great humility that I take on this task, knowing full well that I am NOT a teacher, that it's NOT all gonna be cupcakes and merry-go-rounds, and that we will have our struggles. Heck we may even fail, but I'll know in my gut that I obeyed God Almighty in this. So, therefore I'll leave any and all consequences of my obedience to Him.

So, to answer that first question...I was researching curriculum and stumbled upon some of the most amazing homeschooling/homemaking blogs. Some of them are chock-full of info, tips, and resources for all things related to the subject(s). From there, a new sickness was born, a research bug has bitten me. I'll share more of what I find over time through links on this blog. Yay me! I'm officially a blogger, and soon to be very happy mom with her children at home under foot and in training:)

On My Face